tw: allegations of sexual violence/sexual assault, SVSH, and harm/violence towards minors
*Everything in this post in this post is alleged. Everything I say is my option, and every person is presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Everything in this post is again my opinion, and my opinion only and I do not endorse or promote any hate towards any person involved in this situation. For legal reasons, unless proven beyond reasonable doubt in a court of law and as the time of writing this post these are all allegations and Tana Mongeau’s story and experience.
Oh gosh. I want to start this post and think the only responsible way to start a post like this is by providing a very clear trigger warning. This post will be touching on some very sensitive and triggering topics such as allegations of sexual violence/sexual assault, SVSH, and harm/violence towards minors. Please use the quick exit button on the top left corner to exit this post if you feel like you need to. Your mental health is always more important. Please press here as well for some additional resources. Your story is valid and we should always believe all survivors. Last trigger warning before we get into this story.
Throughout the past week, the internet seems to continue and deepen the discussion revolving the recently resurfaced allegation against YouTuber, music artist, and DJ Cody Ko’s predatory behavior towards the YouTuber, podcaster, and LA socialite Tana Mongeau when she was around the age of 17. This “uncomfortable conversation” has been most recently spearheaded by avid activist and YouTuber D’Angelo Wallace in his most recent youtube video (at the time of writing) posted on July 14th, 2024. Throughout this youtube video, D’Angelo Wallace breaks down the general timeline of when this alleged crime committed by Cody Ko towards Tana Mongeau all the way the most recent developments of this story. Please watch his video if you wish to have the whole details of this story. However the TLDR of this situation boils down to to a few basic facts.
As expressed by Tana herself through her podcast Canceled and her various appearances on other podcasts such as Just Trish with Trisha Paytas, during a party at Playlist Live ~2015/2016, a 25 year old Cody Ko allegedly participated in predatory sexual behavior with a then 17 year old Tana Mongeau. Some important context that really highlights how this was just so gross and inappropriate is that even after being approached and told by YouTuber Gabby Hannah that Tana was 17, a minor, Cody Ko seemed to have shrugged this information off and continued the night ending in Cody Ko ALLEGEDLY committing statutory rape towards Tana Mongeau. I also want everyone to remember that in the state this event took place (Florida) the age of consent is 18. Even then, I think it is very strange that a 25 year old man would be hanging around 17/18/19 year olds. As recapped by YouTube channel Tea Spill, Tana herself has opened about how that experience caused her various forms of trauma and the reason she can be more open with these feelings and experience is due to being more healed from this process.
First I want to start this conversation by making it clear that I believe and support Tana Mongeau. Yes, she has had a controversial past, however someone could have a messy past while also being the victim of a gross, disgusting (alleged) crime where justice should and must be handed out. I’ll be honest, I did not like Tana’s early content as I believe it glamorized and promoted a very toxic lifestyle especially to younger women. However, through the past more recent years Tana seemed to have really tried to shift this image to more mature/healing growing woman. This change includes prioritizing her podcast Cancelled she hosts with LA socialite Brooke Schofield where she shares her past experiences and life as a glimpse into the wildness of Hollywood influence sphere of LA. Throughout researching for this topic, I will say I did find myself giggling to many parts of her podcast and will give Tana her props into seemingly growing into a more confident storyteller and influence.
However throughout this situation, Tana’s controversial past and previous pattern of hyperbolic expression when sharing her experiences has been constantly and repeated used as a way to discredit her and her experience. Additionally, many people also are questioning her story is due to the way and word choice she was using to share her story. For example. Tana will discuss many of these topics through comedy or other forms of more light hearted word choice. Tana also is more open and honest about her sexuality and sex life which many grossly have tried to paint as a reason for Tana not to believed. Additionally, many also think that because Tana chose to disclose this experience later on this also somehow means that her experience isn’t true when that is also gross assumption. I also wish to highlight that Tana herself is in a very powerful position with her platform and even with all her protections and privileges she continues to receive some of the most disgusting and awful comments regarding this situation. While on Just Trish, she highlights how the backlash and reaction is another example of the types of questions and exceptions victims/survivors are forced to meet and if they don’t (like Tana), there story is invalided.
I feel like many of these gross ideas stem from these very false and damaging ideas of what the myth of the “perfect victim” of sexual assault should look like that rape culture has created as a way to policy and assign what makes a story or victim “credible”. These ideas are documented, examined in the book Bodies in Evidence Race, Gender, and Science in Sexual Assault Adjudication by Heather R. Hlavka and Sameena Mulla, researchers of feminist anthropology for the University of New York Press. One of the most common assumed emotions that society expects many victims/survivors of sexual assault is “Shame, particularly sexual shame… and victims of violence who express other emotional responses, such as confusion, anger or betrayal, do not conform to commonplace social expectations” (Hlavka and Mulla 235). Because Tana does not express or convey her feelings towards this situation as shameful, she does not fit into the “commonplace” of society’s expectation of what she “should” feel while sharing this story. Even though various studies have proven that it is very common for victims/survivors to delay coming out with their stories for various reasons (cultural, social, personal, etc.), society still seems to hold this idea that a survivor must come right out and share after the assault or else their story is not valid (Hlavka and Mulla 236). Because Tana also chose to wait to share this story, this assumption of a “timeline” for a sexual assault survivor has been and still is continually projected onto her story. However as detailed throughout Hlavka and Mulla’s research, it is very common for survivor to delay disclosing their experiences for various cultural, social, and personal reasons and does not discredit a survivor’s story.
If you are a person who finds yourself participating in victim blaming behavior or believe those type of narrative then I highly recommend Bodies in Evidence Race, Gender, and Science in Sexual Assault Adjudication as it is a very well detailed and research dive into the legal, cultural and medical factors that contribute tho these larger held social ideas. I would also recommend the video entitled “the Cody Ko Situation” created by Jarvis Johnson and Jordan Adika posted on the podcast channel SadBoyz. Not only are they some of the few youtuber associated in the same algorithmic niche as Cody Ko, but they also help promote resources, donate all money made by the video to RAINN and attempt to deconstruct many of the sexist and victim blaming narratives from the male perspective.
(Updates to Story)
Since I started writing this post there have been a few developments to this story that I wish to touch on. As reported by Youtuber Mogul Mail, Cody Ko has not made an official big statement regarding this situation but has been still activity DJing at a college sorority party (might not be the best look right now in my opinion). However in a letter posted the podcast management company TMG (Tiny Meat Gang), Cody Ko has stepped down from his position and will not be involved in the day to day operations of the company as he once did. Since D’Angelo Wallace’s video, the main official Cody Ko channel has lost subscribers with his subscriber count dropping from 6 million to 5.96 million reflecting how this story has began to really shift his public perception to the larger Youtube community. Yet on terms of an official state from Cody himself and only regarding his alleged harmful behavior towards Tana has not been realised by him or his team at the time of writing.
I wish to close this blog post by emphasizing that the most important take away from this entire situation is always always always believe all survivors/victims who share their story. I believe and stand with Tana Mouguanu and wish her nothing but healing and hope that she is able to move past this situation. One of her main goals in sharing this story is to make other girls feel less alone. Please see these resources if you or someone you know has experienced sexual violence. you are not alone, your story is valid, and you deserve to heal and your story deserves be heard. You are never alone. ❤
